One of life’s greatest adventures is being on your own. I know that I am not alone in being single and the whole this does not bother me. I have got used to being the odd number at a dinner party, not having to consult anyone before accepting invitations and wearing unmatching hideous pyjamas in bed. Having just come through another single Christmas, I consoled myself that although I had to wake up on my own on Christmas morning, I hadn’t had to come up with the amazing thoughtful wow present for a significant other. My friends all take pity on me and the lack of contents in my fridge (a couple of out of date microwave meals, jars of jam and bottles of wine) and I get invited for midweek suppers and Sunday lunches very regularly and I get to borrow all the best bits of their kids (days out, help with dog walking and funny stories) without many of the trickier bits. This is all well and good, but in order to share those little events in my life that amuse, confuse and confound I have resorted to becoming a Facebook addict… and every now and again I would like a hug.
As I write this Valentine’s day is looming….
So, what does a forty and a bit too much ‘girl’ do? The pubs are not full of men my age, unless they are out with their wives and my mates have husbands and kids preventing, not in a bad way, them from going out on the spur of the moment. All my friends have paraded any of their single friends (if they have any) in front of me… did I mention that I am picky? There really is only one avenue open…. internet dating.
There are so many places where you can get advice on how to make your profiles appealing and the do’s and don’ts of dating so I am not even going to bother with all that. I am just going to tell you of some of my experiences and observations, and maybe in another post I will tell you some of my ‘internet dating stories’ when I actually met some of the men who winked at me in a cyberspace kind of way.
The main thing I noticed in the three years I spent trawling the world wide web for the man of my dreams, is that everyone punches a little above their weight. Let’s face it, when confronted by a proforma, a few words and a picture you aren’t going to try and guess whether they are a nice person or not. You are going to look at the picture, and if that doesn’t float your boat you go no further. But nor do the men. You wink at or email the people you think you might fancy… and I fancy Brad Pitt and George Clooney. Likewise they will be fancying the Elle McPhersons and Linda Evangelistas of this world! Don’t be disappointed… everyone is doing it. You will wink at nice looking guys and total frogs will wink at you, but some nice ‘normal’ guys will chuck in the odd wink too.
My next observation is that everyone lies. They put up that great picture of themselves on holiday, taken about 10 years ago (quite often with an obvious significant other cropped out!). No-one will want to describe themselves as overweight, balding and middle aged, even if they are. They will be carrying a couple of extra pounds and be young at heart. Men who call themselves ‘Ravydavy63’, ‘Cooldude54’ and ‘Rudeboy 71’ are kidding themselves that they are still young and trendy… and that number? The year of their birth! The other women are doing it too… so for heavens sake, don’t tell the truth. I tried that for a while, and got nowhere. This is not a world for high principles! Men put up any old picture they have on their computer,, the competition have some amazing professional type pictures, so don’t be tempted to do what the men do… get some decent pictures of yourself, and who cares if a little Photoshop surgery has been applied?!
Finally, for now, if they come with no baggage and have never been married there is a reason for that…..
My next post on love and the single lady? Making contact and getting a date…..
Good luck ladies!