This week my daughter’s class has been learning to write haiku, the elegant Japanese poetry form that celebrates the juxtaposition of stillness and disruption.
Hang on. Stillness, followed by disruption? Sounds a lot like my house.
We decided to try our hand at expressing our feelings about our children’s favourite TV programs. Yes, we’ve clearly got too much time on our hands.
——
Charlie and Lola
Your relationship is sweet
Where are your parents?
——
In the Night Garden
Pontipine children run free
Call child services
——
Peppa the piggy
Jumping in muddy puddles
You’ll get an ASBO
——
George pig still so small
All you say is dinosaur
Won’t get you a job
——
Barney the dino
So big and cuddly and soft
I can punch you hard
——
Hey Mister Tumble
I’ve seen you somewhere before
Maybe on Crimewatch?
——
Dora Explorer
You ask so many questions
You’re my only friend
——
Postman Pat arrives
Special delivery time
Dog poo is a bitch
——
In the Tweenie’s world
Bright colours are everywhere
No-one hears you scream
——
Bella the Tweenie
You always know what to do
The others hate you
——
Balamory time
When your house matches your clothes
It’s called OCD
——
Pingu the penguin
Your Ikea style igloo
Makes me feel jealous
——
Sponge Bob how I laugh
Your wit and humour are hot
I know that is wrong
——
Bob the Builder builds
The scarecrow gets distracted
I think he’d burn well
——
Lazytown you rock
Fruit is known as sports candy
No kid falls for that
——
Deadly 60 thrills
So many vicious creatures
And yet Steve still lives
——
*All haikus are the original work of TMK’s Melissa & Jordanna who clearly watch too much kids’ TV.
We’d love to hear yours. 5 syllables, 7 syllables, 5 syllables. Go!
